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     | |      c   o   m   m   u   n   i   c   a   t   i   o   n   s     | |
     | |________________________________________________________________| |

  ...presents...                    Clubbing
                                                         by Xibo (Mr. Coates)

                      >>> a cDc publication.......1993 <<<
                        -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc-
  ____       _     ____       _       ____       _     ____       _       ____

     For a change of pace I decided to go to a different nightclub tonight, a
place called "The Wild Wild West," famous for its "acre of dancin' and

     So I got there and it was pretty hard to find, hidden behind a Budget Car
Sales dealership.  It was 9:00 p.m. and all the parking was taken, and they're
pointing people off to back streets.  I wandered around looking for "safe"
parking and decided on a shopping center two blocks away.  It was empty when I
parked there, but when I left it was full.

     I entered the place and it was full of cowboys and cowgirls (naturally)
and a few normally (somewhat) dressed peoples, and no teenydoomers.  It was
huge, I mean, it's pretty big.  The "acre" is for real, and it's easily the
biggest nightclub in t00son.  The dance floor is a large oval, much like a
skating rink, with tables and chairs in the middle.  As the country music goes,
people dance and move around the track.  Plus, there's a counter around the
track for people to stand at, and stare at the dancing people, or whatever they
choose to stare at.  Around this are scattered tables, various bars, pool
tables, a cowboy hat store, and a few other things typical to a nightclub.

     The staff, which is to say the female bartenders and waitresses, all had
sexy legs, pleasing to the eye.  The customers, however, did not, for the most
part.  They were of an amazingly wide range of ages, like I've never seen in a
nightclub.  You had young people, early twenties, all the way to old folks, in
their sixties.

     This makes one ask the question, "Why?" and I believe this was because of
this place being the only real C&W bar in t00son that's worth going to.  Which
is amazing considering it's about seven miles from downtown, meaning over a
half-hour drive  for many people.  So anyone who wants to go to a good C&W bar
ends up coming here.  Therefore, the wide range of ages.

     Many people were dressed up Texan-style, with boots and jeans and cowboy
hats and so on.  The girls often wore boots too.  I was overwhelmed first how
many average and sub-average looking chicks there were.  It then occurred to me
that maybe *this* is where all the women go.

     See, lots of guys complain there are no available chicks where they go.
And then through other channels you occasionally hear similar complaints from
women, preposterous as it sounds.  But I think I understand, now.

     Women like C&W more than guys go, and guys prefer rock/top-40.  So there
were many women here.  They were mostly in pairs or groups, too; most looked
rather timid and afraid.  Occasionally cowboys would come up and take them away
to dance around the track a few times and then they'd stop dancing and they'd
be back to sitting and looking sad and talking to their friends.  Meanwhile,
the men wouldn't press beyond a dance or two, afraid of something else, and
overall, it seems like a bad way to meet people.  Though both parties seemed to
want to go home unalone, the men are afraid to ask, "Want to go home with me?"
and the women would probably be too scared to say "Yes" anyway.  Especially in
front of their friends.

     In a corner there were a couple video games, Centipede and Galaga.  I just
stared in shock, unbelieving.  These two games used to also be present at the
industrial disco I normally frequent.  The coincidence sent a shiver down my
spine, and made me pause for a couple minutes.

     About one-tenth of the nightclub is separated by glass, and is darker.
This section has Top-40 music in it, and you can't hear the country music of
the rest of the club in here.  This is where I spent most of my time.

     Very few people were dancing on the small Top-40 dance floor.  When I
walked in, there were six girls and one guy dancing, and all six girls were
trying to avoid the one guy.  He was dancing, not too well, but he was really
trying.  He was using all the moves you see in videos, really putting his heart
into it.  He also appeared to be drunk, which is probably what the girls
thought.  "Eeek, he's drunk, get him away from me."

     The apparently-drunk dancing guy stopped for a bit and stood next to me.
Suddenly he was talking to me, and he was talking like he was drunk.  He did
seem to be having a good time.  He tried to dance with these two chicks that
got on the floor, but they told him to go away, shooing him off rudely.  He
shrugged and returned to me.  "She doesn't like you," I stated.

     He just smiled and said, "Well... that's her prerogative, everyone has
their prerogative ya know?  Like the song...."  I just smiled and nodded, for
he did really have a point.  He asked for a light, which I give him, and then
he headed out to the C&W area.

     So me and my Corona sat down at the counter surrounding this dance floor,
and I watched the various peoples in the Top-40 section.  The girls in here
were a bit better-looking, but only on average.  I did notice that many were
using their best assets to good effect, though.  For example, the slightly
overweight blonde had a red blouse mostly open, and a black bra-thing easily
visible, including her cleavage; parts of her breasts below the bra, too.  Made
me pause and admire for a bit.

     There were others.  This one had short shorts, showing lots of leg;
another with a cut blouse displaying her navel and thin figure; you get the
idea.  Naturally, you must practice the art of watching without staring;
staring being impolite.  This is tricky at times.

     There was one babe there.  Oh, lord was she hot.  She was blonde, and had
glasses, which most women don't bother to wear at discos, preferring to go
blind.  She had white knee-high boots, with a beeper tied to one.  She was
wearing a light blue mini-dress, of thin fabric.  Occasionally guys would talk
with her, dance with her for a while, and go away.  I don't know what her goals
were; I could only speculate.  What kind of person brings a beeper to a
nightclub on a Saturday night?

     She was so sensual, too.  When she would dance, it was the dirty dancing
style and the dress would hike up her sexy smooth legs.  Her nipples on her
small breasts would get hard; you could see 'em through the dress.  Her body
would undulate as she danced, the form of her belly moving in and out with the
music, and the dress so thin you could see clearly the shape of her thighs,
waist, and....  Well, it was quite a sight to see, lemme tell ya.  When Snap's
"I've Got the Power" came on, I wanted to dance pretty bad, to go over and ask
her to dance, but some other handsome cowboy was asking her so I just sipped my
beer.  I fantasized that she was an intellectual type and this was just her
being dressed to kill.

     But reality had to set in.  I wasn't going to get to know this person, and
chances were high I wouldn't be returning to this club again.  The futility of
it all overcame me and I left before I got a chance to make a fool of myself.
Years of clubbing has never led me toward really meeting any women; just a few
brief encounters, never to see the girl again.  But I have to try, and
continue, for the alternatives suck royally.
 _______  __________________________________________________________________
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   (U)   |==================================================================|
  .ooM   |1993 cDc communications by Xibo (Mr. Coates)         07/01/93-#238|
\_______/|Seven SUPER-CALI-FRAGIL-ISTIC-EXPI-ALI-DOCIOUS years of cDc.  K!  |