_ _ ((___)) [ x x ] cDc communications \ / Global Domination Update #22 (' ') September 1st, 1997 (U) Est. 1984 FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE FOR MORE INFORMATION, CONTACT: email@example.com DEEP-FRIED ATTITUDE FOR A WORLD STARVED FOR SUPERHEROES CULT OF THE DEAD COW (cDc) regrets the delay in releasing our glorious Global Domination Update. What with George Clooney hopping onto Princess Diana's coffin to settle old scores with the tabloids, it's been hell trying to get a word in edgewise. But we bear our burdens and move on. And so it is -- after much grieving and maudlin songs -- that the CULT OF THE DEAD COW releases two file packs of five files each, anoints one new member and expands on our work with the Hong Kong Blondes. As our young people skip off to school, lunch pails bursting with wholesome treats and whistling their favorite video bits, we at the CULT OF THE DEAD COW DISTANCE LEARNING CENTER have labored long and hard to shine a light in the darkness -- sort of like high-beams along the information superhighway. Our crack team of learning experts have put together a wack packet of mind expanding mayhem in the hope that it will be the one thing that keeps our youth from purchasing firearms, or seeking employment in Redmond. We take special pride in announcing a new member to our ranks who goes by the name, SirDystic. He is rumored to be the child of Seymour Cray and an unknown showgirl. We found him living in a dumpster with a Palm Pilot, a case of Astroglide and his latest text file. Remember the Internet worm? Imagine the same thing, only _bigger_. An automated, systemic infection of the Internet -- all made possible because of the success of Bill Gates' dream of a computer in every home, running Windows. With a little work and SirDystic's file, this is just one possibility. It was a long hot summer for the HERD. The heat off the flashpacks and klieg lights at DefCon and H.O.P.E. were trying, but they come with the territory. Grandmaster Ratte's breakthrough performance at DefCon was the talk of Las Vegas, as was Microsoft's idle promise to give cDc Hacker Laureate Mudge the keys to the kingdom. Kaiser Wilhelm's star braun-nosers, Karan Khanna (head of NT Marketing) and Paul Leech (one of the main developers and author of the CIFS specification) promised Mudge a subscription to DevNet for a year and a link to the L0pht's site from Microsoft's Web page. Waiting - still waiting. And of the many happy memories at H.O.P.E., the CULT OF THE DEAD COW'S official announcement of our strategic alliance with the Hong Kong Blondes was received to deafening applause. The Hong Kong Blondes are a group of computer scientists and human rights activists who have taken the revolution on-line. They are active in Hong Kong, Shanghai and Beijing. And you can bet you'll be hearing a lot more about the real meaning of payback if the government of geriatric kleptocrats don't keep their word on social reform. Check the new cDc homepage (www.cultdeadcow.com) for future announcements. And support human rights in China -- the cDc does. Oh, one last morsel. The CULT OF THE DEAD COW has been requested by the Electronic Frontier Foundation to take over the EFF's ftp archives. The circle is now complete. The group that for so long has contributed to the computer underground will soon become the official custodian of its content. (Look for a full announcement soon.) And you thought we didn't have a plan. Damn, we're good. _ _ the tedium is the message _ _ ((___)) INFORMATION IS JUNK MAIL ((___)) [ x x ] _ [ x x ] \ / _ |_|_ _ _|_ _|_ |_ _ _| _ _. _| _ _ \ / (' ') (_|_|| |_ (_) | |_ | |(/_ (_|(/_(_|(_| (_(_)\_/\_/ (' ') (U) (U) .ooM cDc communications .ooM deal with it NEW RELEASES FOR SEPTEMBER, 1997: deal with it ________________________________/text files\________________________________ 331:"Angry Sun" by Franken Gibe. It's sundown on satori. If you like sand up your ass or you're just plain photophobic, this one's for you. 332:"Don't Talk to Cops" by Robert W. Zeuner. Mom says never to talk to strangers and Bessie says "Don't talk to the Man". Find out why. 333:"BELLK0RE Exposed!" by Oderus Urungus. This d00d smells somethin' bad. And with a name like his, y'all know he's onto da shit. 334:"Making a Mess at 7-11" by Snarfblat. Bored? Stupid? No girlfriend? Practice making a mess so you'll have it all mastered for your first basement apartment. 335:"Milk and Blood" by Lady Carolin. If the pasture's a-rockin, don't come a-knockin'. Notes from a damp commando. *** 336:"I'd Rather be Dead than Live in California" by Oxblood Ruffin. The land of sunshine sucks more than your favorite hustler. Read and learn. 337:"Reid Fleming: Lady Killer" by Reid Fleming. What do you do with a chick whose twat looks like a three ring binder? Find out from the cDc's own man of steel. 338:"Who's Gonna Get Screwed Today? NetBIOS Attacks over TCP" by SirDystic. Our latest member turns Bill Gates into his personal prison bitch. Bend over, big boy. This will only hurt you in the wallet. 339:"Political Rant #1" by The Nightstalker. If he needs your opinion he'll give it to you. But you have to learn the Macarena all by yourself. 340:"Hacking PC/Payroll for Windows" by Tarkin Darklighter. Why buy lotto tickets when you can hack all the cash you need? Remember kidZz - this file's just for educational purposes. Reading is FUNdamental! _______________________________/ - x X x - \________________________________ Thanks to the following items of influence this time around: WAREZ: BeOS - the cDc's official operating system - and Dem0nseed ELITE MUSIC: The Meters, DJ COLDCUT, Kid Koala (remember - you heard about the Kid here first.) FOOD: The Quadropounder PRINT: Chuck Yeager autobiography, anything by Harold Innis BUGS: Any two girlies from Montreal Fools better recognize: CULT OF THE DEAD COW is a publication and trademark of cDc communications. Established in 1984, cDc is the largest and oldest organization of the telecommunications underground worldwide, and inventor of the "e-zine." Every issue is produced on an Apple II for genuine old-school flavor. You thirst for our body of work, you know you do. Find it at these fine locations, among others: World Wide Web: http://www.L0pht.com/cdc.html http://www.cultdeadcow.com FTP/Gopher: cascade.net in pub/cDc Usenet: alt.fan.cult-dead-cow BBS: 806/794-4362 Entry:KILL For further information, contact: Email: firstname.lastname@example.org Postal: POB 53011, Lubbock, TX, 79453, USA If you have a file to submit, send it to: email@example.com Sincerely, Grandmaster Ratte' cDc/Editor, Fearless Leader, and Pontiff "We're into text philes for the girlies and the money." #### By Oxblood Ruffin, Reid Fleming, Omega & GRatte'. Copyright (c) 1997 cDc communications.